The perfect example of piss poor lyrics

As the title says I have come across one of many songs out there that cobbles together a half decent tune and then fills it with nonsensical lyrics. Most of the time I couldn't care less..this time though it has irritated me muchly.

UK top 40 is a box of shit and the occasional diamond. Mostly though in 10 years you won't want to listen to any of this stuff again. So at number one we have 'Fireflies'. Let me just point out that like the masses I sort of like this song, when I heard it on the radio it wasn't an instant station changer. But unlike most people I didn't just listen to this song and enjoy it, I analysed it. And the results are abysmal. If this was a cancer patient it would have 2 days to live.

You would not believe your eyes
If ten million fireflies
Lit up the world as I fell asleep

I don't like the idea of 10 million, I would rather it was 10 thousand. I also don't like being told what I wouldn't believe. I wouldn't believe this song's lyrics are rated 5 golden stars on some websites but hey, what do I know? Why not tell me? You told me what I wouldn't believe so tell me what I know, you smug bastard.

Cause they'd fill the open air
And leave teardrops everywhere
You'd think me rude
But I would just stand and stare

Crying fireflies? I don't understand the nature of this shit. I also would not think you rude if you stood and stared at 10 million fireflies sobbing about the place. Please do i'll join you.

'I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems'

Oh wow. Okay let's take this slowly. How slow do you want the earth to turn? Why do you spend nights wanting that sort of thing? Isn't there better things to dream about than how fast the fucking earth rotates?
(Isn't there better things to do than sit and rip into a popular song for the sake of a facebook note? Fuck you voice in my head)

I physically can not get my head around the mish mash that is 'It's hard to say that I'd rather stay Awake when I'm asleep'. I give up, I don't want to spend any more time with this set of words please.

'Cause I'd get a thousand hugs
From ten thousand lightning bugs
As they tried to teach me how to dance'

Oh wow, and just as I thought this was an adult orientated song with real meaning and emotional undertones it throws up that word vomit. A thousand hugs from 10 million 'lightning bugs'? You have serious problems my friend.

Leave my door open just a crack
(Please take me away from here)
'Cause I feel like such an insomniac
(Please take me away from here)
Why do I tire of counting sheep
(Please take me away from here)
When I'm far too tired to fall asleep

BECAUSE YOU FUCKING MANIAC you spend all night thinking of hugging more shitting fireflies than I can be bothered to count, and you want them to TEACH YOU TO DANCE? Jesus!!!

I'm weird 'cause I hate goodbyes
I got misty eyes as they said farewell

You're weird because you are even contemplating saying goodbye to 10 million fireflies, that's where the problem lies here. Also you're not the only one who hates goodbyes, so you're not weird as far as that's concerned. The rest, well i'm not a fucking doctor but you need therapy and lots of it

But I'll know where several are
If my dreams get real bizarre
'Cause I saved a few and I keep them in a jar

He captures fireflies incase of nightmares? My god this is JUST HORRIBLE

Rant over.