The conspiracy files

Why do people not understand what is laid on the plate infront of them? Recently I have noticed just how many people are convincing themselves and others that 9/11 was not all it seemed.
Add 9 and 11 and you get *counts on fingers* 20, there we go. That means nothing...stop trying to add numbers and get an answer.

Conspiracy therories will be around as long as us humans exist, but sometimes it goes beyond ridiculous.

If it were up to these sort of people this is the world we would live in:

Tuesday 9th october-The sun

Elvis is to start his huge comeback tour now that all his previous hits have been rehashed to within an inch of their life.
A source close to THE SUN can report that he has had enough of half arsed dance remixes and thinks it's time the KING came back and showed the kids what ELVIS is all about. We found some 'kids' mugging an old woman and asked them if they were excited about the return of THE KING

"Couldn't give a f*ck mate,you ain't got a light have ya??"

Tickets are going on sale this saturday head to head with the spice girls, let the battle of the bitches begin!


NASA moon landing experience- Evening standard

NASA have opened the doors to the studio used in the 1969 moon landing today, the pulblic can now tread over the same soundstage that Buzz Aldrin once graced. The set has remained practicaly unused (eastenders once hired the set for three days). A gift shop has been installed just behind a small crater offering the usual tacky souveniers you can expect to see at such exibitions.
Tickets are on sale for $45 per person *this includes children*

Shakescare- London lite

Madame Tussauds unveiled their latest addition to the chamber of horrors during a C-list packed function last night. William shakespeare can now be seen alongside Hitler and Jack the ripper. It was made public two months ago that william shakespeare was in fact a drunken lady of the night who wrote rude poems on the back of used tissues. Although she never commited murder like most of her new neighbours the Tussauds group say,

"She has basicaly murdered every school child who ever had to study her work, we were tricked into thinking lude remarks and sexualy explicit stories were in fact brilliant pieces of art"

Steven fry was asked about his thoughts on the new exibit after filming QI last night, to which he responded

"Good f*cking riddance, that t*sser had us all making sense of what has turnt out to be the most horrific use of sexual slurs I have yet to encounter"